i feel miserable. and if doing something that could make me feel better is wrong, then i don't understand how human's head works.

eulogy

we are not related by blood. we are tied mutually by an informal bond that is bridged through the same belief.

i would not say that i personally know you well as we did not really cross each other's path a lot in the past.

i got to know you through your brothers, who were my classmates. who used to study together along with my other friends. i got to know you when we met once in a while at family gatherings.

i heard a lot from your friends and family, what a great person you are. and all that's left now, are patches and pieces of your adorable jesting, vivified smile, contagious exuberance and the very person that you are, in a figment form that occupies parts of our memory cells.

it breaks my heart that chances did not award me the opportunity to visit you, not even once when you were struggling and battling on the bed, in that patient uniform.

god bless your soul, on perhaps the night that every strong believer is seeking for, lailatul qadar.

crying my eyes out for your family's loss was certainly not a choice.

in loving memory of syahir lokman. you are loved for eternity.

renovation

school is already peeking its head out of its butt. and i realized that i was still in holiday mood. and i figured, this is bad, isn't this? i made a small calculation at the back of my head. so how is it going to be this year?

loose sheets or another bulky notebooks? with sheets, i tend to confuse which note comes first when i finally arrive to the note-reorganizing time later. placing dates on top of the notes did not work for me. with books, i tend to forget them at home.

i know right? it's not like my fellow centipede friends are going to bother to read them. but it's just my nature to be forgetful. god knows how it'll be when i turn 30. or 60. i'd probably be more awesome?

then i thought, maybe i should just type my notes instead. my macbook is awesome. being awesome is its purpose of living. then my buddy came up with this kind-of-awesome idea. i should write. then type them up at night or maybe on the weekend, as revision. ladies and gentlemen, i'll do, just that! well, i'll try my best to keep on doing that until the end of the term.

okay i like where this is going. i'm starting to feel the excitement of going back to school. so now i'm set. just need to decide on sheets or books. no more stupid stupidities that governed my awesome life last year.

raya is also peeking its head out of its... some other much more decent hole.

please don't. (said in ted mosby's way)

mission

accomplished. oh yeah. i finished reading the romance novel yesterday morning before I went to sleep. i'm having sleeping problem lately. my eyes need to sleep but i can't seem to shut my mind down.

by the way, the book was "chasing perfect" by susan mallery. not bad actually. a bit cheesy. and dirty. damn, i'm not reading another romance novel. euw.

i'm currently addicted to how i met your mother. i've been locking my eyeballs on laptop screen on average 62.5% of the day these few days. and today i found my head pounding after watching over 20 episodes non-stop. well, i did take a 5-minute break to pee. and another 15-minute break to have super simple iftaar. and occasional short breaks for prayers.

i then decided to read the newspaper instead, made myself a cup of tea and finally solved sudoku in the 'diversions' section of national post's arts & life. and guess what happened. the headache was cured. what up~ okay, so now i'm good for another round of how i met your mother marathon.

legen--- wait for it---
DARY!

p/s: initially, i accidentally posted this on mymac's website. haha.